Your Girlfriend Wants a Break – What Does it Mean?
Believe it or not when your girlfriend asks for a break it’s good news. It means she’s not through with the relationship yet, and hasn’t fully decided to break up with you. In the meantime she wants something done.
If your girlfriend wants a break, what she usually wants is change. How you address her offer to put your relationship on hold will affect whether or not you get back together with your ex-girlfriend.
Often times, the request for a break will come from out of nowhere. That’s because you didn’t see anything wrong with the relationship but your girlfriend did. She’s not happy with the way things are, and maybe she’s even tried to talk to you about that.
Maybe her words fell on deaf ears, and you didn’t take the time to listen to what she was saying. This resulted in her feeling frustrated, and maybe even angry with you at not hearing her out. To get your attention she pulls the ultimate move: “I think we should take a break from each other”.
If you’re not careful, your break will become a breakup. This is why need to act very quickly as soon as your girlfriend decides that she needs some time away from you. Wait too long, and she’s going to lose interest, and maybe even find another guy. Handling the situation immediately is your only option.
As soon as you girlfriend suggests taking a break from your relationship, you need to calm down, look her in the eye, and nod your head. By not fighting her on her decision to walk away, you’re effectively walking away from yourself. She doesn’t expect this or wants it. What she wants is for you to fight for the relationship, which shows that you actually care.
It’s not that you don’t care, but you cannot show her any signs of weakness right now. What she wants is to make a lasting impact in your mind – she wants to send you the message that she means business, and that you need to take her feelings carefully into consideration.
Your girlfriend actually wants one thing: for you to talk her out of the break. She wants to hear that you’ll change for her and that you’ve understood how wrong you are about certain things. Instead of doing that, you must walk away – at least for now.
Bowing down and catering to her at this moment will let her know that the weapon she used will be effective against you in the future. She’ll always remember what happened here and know that threatening to break up with you gets the results that she wants. That’s the last thing you need if you want to continue a good, healthy relationship with your girlfriend.
Imagine your girlfriend’s reaction when you don’t fight her on the idea of breaking up. Even if she phrases it as “only a break”, you need to treat it as if your girlfriend is actually breaking up with you. You need to break contact, turn off your phone, unplug your computer, and move on with your life. When you’re not chasing her, she’s very quickly going to get very nervous about where you are and what you’re doing.
What she wanted, was you to stick around in a neutral, friendly way so she could keep tabs on what you’re doing and decide when she wants to get back together with you. By taking yourself away and refusing to play her game, you’re putting yourself into a position of power and leaving her with none of the good cards in the deck.
When your girlfriend wants a break it’s nothing but a game. It’s her way of drawing you into realising that you might lose something special. While by itself this isn’t such a bad thing, the way she’s going about it is immature and wrong. Either you break up or you don’t break up, and you need to let her know that. Semi-breaking up isn’t a viable option in a healthy relationship. It’s what kids do in high school and always results in confusion, bitterness, resentment, and all other emotions that will hinder having any kind of solid future relationship with your ex-girlfriend.
If you really love and care about your girlfriend, you’ll need to have a definite plan as to what to do to prevent your break from becoming a breakup. “Winging it” is not an option.
Sitting back and hoping things work out for the best is the even worse mistake. You need a step-by-step blueprint for getting your girlfriend back, and for putting your relationship back on track to be something you both enjoy.