Hello my friends,
To quote a famous song that was sung by Barbra Streisand and Neil Diamond, the title says it all. The lyrics are as follows:
You do not bring me flowers
You do not sing me love songs
You severely talk to me anymore
When you come through the door
At the end of the day
I remember when
You could not wait to love me
Used to hate to leave me
Now after loving 'me late at night
When it's good for you
And you're feeling alright
Well you just roll over
And you turn out the light
And you do not bring me flowers anymore
It used to be so natural
To talk about forever
But 'used to Be's' do not count anymore
They just lay on the floor
'Til we sweep them away
And baby, I remember
All the things you taught me
I learned how to laugh
And I learned how to cry
Well I learned how to love
Even learned how to lie
You'd think I could learn
How to tell you goodbye
'Cause you do not bring me flowers anymore
There are so many out there that can not only read these lyrics, but they have LIVED them. The song itself is talking about the love that what once was. We have all been there. We can listen to love songs and feel our hearts swell because we have placed value as well as people in the roles that were once played in our lives. People come and people go yet the memories of our minds can not exceed the feelings in our hearts.
No one can write down exactly how it feels to be broken hearted. The feeling is devastating, cold and very lonely. Feeling you have NEVER felt creep in and you begin to slowly fade into the shadows of depression. You friends and family begin to worry and you tend to wonder if you will ever be happy again. When you heart is broken, a simple task such as smiling seems almost impossible. Staring at your feet and thinking of once was a warm bed for two can be Over-whelming. Tears form and slowly find themselves caressing your cheeks as the fall silently off your chin and on your shoes.
Sometimes the darkness comes too soon. We tend to let the memories of yesterday take over our present and ruin our future. Let the tread mill begin because we are going no where emotionally.
Now sit back and relax … here is where you are going to change your life. I can 100% guarantee if you have an open mind and a willing heart that you can not only get "YOU" back, but you can become the person you were destined to be. We all have a purpose, we all all destined for something great NO MATTER HOW YOU ARE FEELING NOW.
Let's break this down …
The word "NOW" means the present. In the present you MAY feel horrible but chances are something is going to happen.
1. You are going to feel better in time
2. You are going to feel BETTER THAN GREAT in time.
Regardless of how you look at it, you are going to be fine. We all know the No Contact rule, we know what others have done to get their ex back, we know the success stories and we know those who have become wiser since their best efforts to get someone back. You life is what you make it. NOT SOMEONE ELSE. If you base your happiness on someone else, and they leave, what have you gained? Where is your happiness, where is your victory? Where is your self-confidence? In short, YOU GAVE IT AWAY !!
What so many people do not realize, is that MOST OF THE TIME, there is NO ACTION involved in getting a lover back.
** READ THAT AGAIN PLEASE **
'MOST OF THE TIME, there is NO ACTION involved in getting a lover back.'
Let me explain …
I know what your thinking. You want to tell me by doing nothing NOTHING will happen and I am here to tell you that you are wrong. Depending on the love bond that was created when you were together, NOT THE TIME involved, the love bond itself … this will be the very key to getting your lover back.
If you want to look at it this way, ask yourself these questions and be 100% honest: Feel free to write your answers.
1. Did I give my ex the respect they deserved?
2. Describe my lover saying they loved me, did they show it consistently?
3. Did I give my lover the space they needed?
4. Did I encourage my lover to be the best they could be?
5. Was I a good listener to my lover?
6. Would I consider my lover my best friend?
7. If my lover and I disagreed, did we agree to disagree?
8. Did I give up myself in order to be loved by them?
9. Do you believe that You + Your Ex = Your Happiness?
10. Do you know that you are going to alright no matter what?
Getting a lover back, starts with YOU. I do not care what your friends say, LOVE does not cost a thing. Do you think for ONE MOMENT that a dozen roses is going to bring back your ex? Or an expensive gift? A declaration of changing? A ring? A false promise that you will keep for maybe 2 months? A proposal?
One honest answer "NO !!" The reason is they want YOU … NOT gifts. You were amazing enough to get to know in the beginning. Were you acting? Were you on your best behavior "just because?" When you said you loved them did ya mean it or were you just trying to keep them with you?
People breakup because of several reasons but the main one is simple.
Does this sound familiar?
"They started to change and act different"
You were born an individual and you will die one. You are a separate person from what you love. You are able to be happy with yourself and NOT put that pressure on someone else. Ever met a whiner? Someone who does not want to do this or that? No matter what you want to do to make them happy or please them, it just will not happen. Its because they do not value themselves. Run away like FOREST GUMP as fast as you can !! You will be beating your head against the wall if you attempt this one.
Most of the comments and emails I get ask questions like "What do you think they?" The answer is "WHAT DO YOU KNOW?" We are not mind reader. We have NO IDEA what others are thinking. What is the thing you do know 100%? You know what you are doing and what you are thinking?
* Important *
GO WITH WHAT YOU KNOW … NOT WHAT YOU ASSUME OR HEARD!
I do not care if you talk to your ex's parents … (bad idea) GO WITH WHAT YOU KNOW!
If you are assuming something, let it go. Tell your self it is ONLY an assumption and let it go. It solves nothing and you will worry yourself into make HUGE mistakes in the long run.
Take the focus off your ex and put it on you. IT IS NOT SELFISH !! You can do NOTHING (an action) to bring your ex back. Leave them alone and by doing so you are actually creating a loving experience.
Ever had a breakup, and out of desperation, all you want your ex to go is LISTEN to you because you think you can explain why or you assume you can talk them out of the breakup. The more you call, drop by, follow your ex to work, text message or email, the more and more they are going to look at you (SOMEONE THEY ARE STILL IN LOVE WITH) AS CRAZY !!! You did not leave them alone when all you had to do is take the focus off of them and onto you. What you have done is create a BETTER reason for breaking up with you. YOU JUST VALIDATED YOU EX !! AARRGGHH !!
Ever been told by someone you love to "PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE and GO AWAY !?" Sadly, you did it to yourself. Do you know what an urban myth is? It's something you may have heard but you do not know if it is true or not? Well let me give you the TRUTH on something.
** Listen carefully **
TOP TEN WAYS TO NEVER GET YOU EX BACK!
4. Email or text too much (let it go..it solves nothing)
5. Promises of change
6. Drunken phone calls or visits
7. Calling their friends or parents! NO WAY! DO NOT EVEN GO THERE!
8. Name calling or yelling
10.Hurting yourself in an effort to provoke sympathy from your ex.
Ladies and gentlemen, I can not express that is it NOT about them. It is about you; What you do that matters. When I say "do" I am referring to way of helping yourself. If you ex loves you and you improve yourself how can you go wrong? I'm NOT saying that they will come back but your chances are almost tripled if you do. Do not ask friends about your ex, ask them what you can do to improve yourself? Let them help YOU. You can do it! Love as no limits.
Take responsibility for your OWN actions. You have no control over your ex WHATSOEVER! NONE! You can change or do do nothing to change their mind. If you continue to wait for someone who does not; t know what they want … MOVE ON !!
Ever stand in a line where you were ordering food and the person in front of you was indecisive? Do you get annoyed? Does it bother you? Do you wait and wait and wait making excuses and time lowly ticks by? I SERIOUSLY doubt it, I bey you MOVE TO A DIFFERENT line. STOP making excuses for others and stand up straight be YOU! Let them worry about them. Sounds a tad ugly but you can not sit around waiting for a train at the bus station !! It will never come!
In closing, I want to say this to all the broken hearted out there. I say a prayer for you guys every night. I am here because I care and God has given me a purpose. I have the ability to do AMAZING things and you have the git within you as well. There are HUNDREDS of gifted people who have been were you on this wonderful forum that are here to help you when you feel down, free of charge. I was once just like you. I got my ex back. I loved her back to me. It was a tough road but it was not until I let go, did we come back together. We typically find what we are looking for when we are NOT looking for it.
You have the potential to do whatever your desires. You have to make it happen. You can not expect the world to give it to you but it is there to take if you want it bad enough. People will come and go in your life. Stay with those who make a positive impact. We become the company we keep. Surround yourself with success and you will inherit that ability because you will want it bad enough. The same goes for this forum, surround yourself with caring, loving people from around the world and one day..you will not be taking advise, you will be the one giving it.
I wish you all the best. God bless and reach for the stars!
YOU CAN DO IT … believe in yourself!